(Minghui.org) Greetings, Master. Greetings, fellow practitioners.
In 2017, I began contacting local organizations in order to promote Shen Yun. I talked about how, after I watched Shen Yun, I realized that the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) brainwashed the Chinese people. The performances sparked my desire to seek the truth, and I went from being a CCP member to an American who values freedom and democracy. Every time I told my story, people suggested I share my personal experience with others. One woman arranged for me to meet the head of her club and I was invited to give a presentation.
I thought about how to tell people about the CCP’s persecution of Falun Dafa while promoting Shen Yun. At that time, the documentary film Agenda: Grinding America Down had just been released. I watched it four times and felt as if I received divine guidance. Each evening after I did the exercises and read the Fa, I worked on my presentation. I combined my accumulated knowledge about the CCP’s infiltration into the United States using articles published by The Epoch Times. I also integrated the content of the documentary to show how communist ideology is deliberately threatening the U.S. In one week I completed the outline of my speech.
A few weeks later I gave my first presentation at a club. I began by recounting how I used to be pro-CCP and argued with my Taiwanese friend over the China-Taiwan issue. However, after watching Shen Yun, I had a strong desire to learn the truth. I summarized the two key traits of communism: brutality and deceit. I supported what I found during my research by citing my personal experiences.
I pointed out how the CCP has infiltrated various aspects of American society – economics, culture, education, and politics. I then expanded on the book The Naked Communist: Exposing Communism and Restoring Freedom by W. Cleon Skousen published in 1958, which listed 45 Goals of Communism and how it aims to subvert America. I earnestly told the audience not to lose hope in the ongoing battle between justice and evil. I assured them that Shen Yun, with its purity and traditional values, is cleansing people’s minds and freeing them from the control of the communist specter.
I said if a Shen Yun performance led to the greatest turning point in my life many years ago, the more people who know about Shen Yun, the more people will be awakened. As I ended my speech, the audience stood up, applauding. Many people shook my hand and told me it was one of the best presentations they'd ever heard. That night, I received an invitation from the largest local group in Northern California to give my presentation.
As I gained more experience in public speaking, I began to incorporate content exposing the CCP using articles from The Epoch Times. I was able to distribute both The Epoch Times and Shen Yun promotional materials after my presentation. To this day whenever I attend an event, people come up to me and express their appreciation for Shen Yun and The Epoch Times.
When I look back over the entire process, I find it truly unbelievable. I know that it was because my cultivation met the requirements of the Fa at that level, and Dafa gave me wisdom. In one short week, I accomplished what seemed an impossible task.
I have always felt that the experiences, knowledge, and skills I accumulated in the secular world could be applied to Dafa projects. Similarly, the wisdom unlocked through cultivation, righteous thoughts, and the confidence gained from Dafa projects can be employed in the secular world to save people.
During the COVID pandemic, I worked remotely from home. I conducted video calls and meetings with colleagues in various parts of the United States, as well as Europe and Asia. I had an idea of using video calls to promote Shen Yun.
One time, a colleague from the marketing division missed our weekly meeting. He later called me to inquire about the project’s progress. Just as he was about to end the call, I picked up a Shen Yun promotional booklet and held it up to the camera. “I just received this pamphlet. Have you heard of Shen Yun?” I asked. He replied that he hadn’t. I began telling him about Shen Yun. As he listened quietly a smile gradually appeared on his face. He later took his family to see the performances.
I met a famous coach who coached teams that won world champions, Australian champions, executives from leading companies around the world, and professional sports teams. He also published two best-selling books. I had a chance to conduct a private one-on-one training with him. I answered some of his questions according to the standards of a practitioner, and he said that I was different from most people. I told him about Shen Yun, which was then touring Australia. He took his family and friends to watch the show and highly praised it. At the end of the training, I told him about Falun Dafa. He was very interested and said he would read Zhuan Falun.
A staff member on my team came from Colombia, South America. I did my best to manage the team according to the principles of Truthfulness, Compassion, and Forbearance. She later told me that because I lived in California and came from communist China, she assumed I had leftist leanings. I eventually became the person she trusted most. She sent me a photo she took while traveling in Europe. It showed a bright yellow banner displayed near a street corner, with the words, “Falun Dafa Is Good.” Looking at the photo I smiled happily.
Letting Go of Ego and Remaining Unperturbed by Praise or Blame
Thanks to my speaking engagements, I built connections and had some influence with the conservative community in Northern California. In early 2020, when the lockdown in Wuhan began, and because I had relatives who lived there, I wrote an article condemning the CCP’s suppression of the truth and sent it to everyone I knew. I immediately received replies. One person said, “Your writing is fantastic, but the article is too short. I want to read more.” As the article gained popularity among readers, the Freedom Forum, which usually invites nationally renowned figures, contacted me and I was invited to speak.
As my speeches became more and more popular, some suggested that I go to the White House as an advisor to the President. Others encouraged me to run for office at the state and county level. Gradually, I became a little complacent. My hidden ego began to feel pretty good about myself.
I remember I was the last speaker at a convention attended by hundreds of people. I finished my speech and slowly walked off the stage amidst thunderous applause. Returning to my seat, I waited for more compliments and praise. But since the convention immediately moved on to the next agenda, and people were busy getting ready, I was kind of disappointed. The quest for fame swept through me.
Sometimes radio stations invited me for interviews. After receiving feedback that my programs were the best they’d ever heard, I intended to keep the links of these programs so I could show off someday in the future.
In the early stages of promoting Shen Yun, as the coordinator of the Shen Yun presentation team, I collaborated with a practitioner who excelled in presentations. We attended numerous club luncheons and gave presentations, which helped us build a network of connections.
Once I started giving presentations myself, I encountered people I’d met before who praised me and it made me wonder: Is she implying that I’m better than that other practitioner? That practitioner has a deep cultural background and a unique insight into current events and can be considered a seasoned veteran.
On the other hand, I merely stood out slightly because I talked about a specific topic, and I needed to improve in many other aspects. Once, after that practitioner gave a presentation, one woman who attended it was so excited that she called me and told me that she’d met my boss that day. She called to praise that practitioner (who she thought was my boss) since we both were members of the same club.
I could not take it anymore – my competitive and jealous feelings immediately surfaced. I replied, “We used to work together, but he’s not my boss.” She clearly sensed my negative emotions and quickly ended the conversation politely. After hanging up, I still felt indignant. For a long time afterward, whenever I thought about this incident, I still felt resentful.
After I saw these filthy attachments, I worked hard to take fame, personal gain, and self-importance lightly. Due to the nature of my job, I had close connections with some top executives at the company, and I had significant influence over key issues. Because of this, I often felt that I was standing on the brink of an endless abyss of ordinary human power and desire.
This internal struggle never seemed to stop. There were constant xinxing tests, and I reminded myself that I would fall if I didn’t remain clear-headed.
One person favored by a high-ranking executive felt that a certain proposal of mine infringed on her interests. She deviated from her usual mild manner and rudely interrupted me, reprimanded me, and implied I didn’t understand the business.
I was not moved and continued giving my presentation. Gradually, her tone softened, she started nodding slightly, and finally, in a gentle voice, she reminded me that she would be flying to headquarters next week and not to forget our scheduled meeting.
Hours later when I recalled the phone call, I suddenly realized that several of my colleagues were present during the conversation, including one of the new recruits on my team. It made me a little uncomfortable and I felt humiliated and wronged. Why was this person like this? Wasn’t she publicly humiliating me? How can she be a leader if she's so emotional?
I decided that I would talk to the executive and tell her that this person wasn’t as excellent as she thought. Various negative thoughts surged through my mind. I was like the person Master mentioned, “He would try to get back at whoever caused this, and rally people to his side.” (The Fourth Talk, Zhuan Falun) However, as a cultivator, I worked hard to control myself and restrain my anger.
In the following days my rage gradually subsided. Eventually I had no thoughts about it at all.
A few days later, I understood what Master wrote, “He is right, I am wrong, What’s to dispute?” (“Who’s Right, Who’s Wrong,” Hong Yin III). I realized that she was someone who had a karmic connection with me, and was waiting to be saved.
Several days later, when we attended a meeting together, I intentionally chose a seat on the side and didn’t vie for attention. I listened attentively as she confidently gave her presentation. The next day, we met in person to discuss work. By the time our meeting ended, we became close. I felt it set the stage for me to clarify the truth to her in the future.
Eliminating Resentment and Resolving an Ordeal
After I began practicing Falun Dafa, my father noticed my positive physical and mental changes, and he was interested in practicing. My parents decided to move from China to a comfortable house just a few minutes away from my home. In the eyes of others, I’m a filial daughter. I not only arranged for my two elderly parents to stay near me, I also took care of them financially and oversaw all aspects of their lives. On the surface, I modestly said that I was only doing what practitioners should do, but in reality, I felt increasingly unsettled and resentful.
Due to my parents’ language barrier and inability to drive, I was their driver, financial manager, buyer, maintenance worker, translator, and personal assistant. Whenever my parents encountered any issues, they immediately called me. It didn’t matter if I was in a meeting or on a business trip. If they did not feel well, they called and asked if they should take medicine. Even when the computer was down, they contacted me.
Because they were not satisfied, I had to take my parents to see seven different doctors. When one of my parents had to have a tooth extracted and an implant put in, and they felt that the nearest dentists’ offices weren’t good, so they chose a dental school far away in San Francisco. This went on for six months. Each time, I had to leave work early, and it was the middle of the night when I finally got home. When my mother’s youngest sister came to visit them from Australia, she was shocked by how demanding my parents were.
Over time, my resentment began to grow and it finally peaked last year. My mother has Parkinson’s disease and my father has taken care of her for years. He began to lose weight during the COVID pandemic, and he wasn't as strong as he used to be. Finally, he couldn’t resist his doctor’s urging and agreed to go to Stanford Hospital for a checkup. The first time we went there, it took us half a day, but the doctors said nothing was wrong. However, the next day, he suddenly had abdominal pain and went to the emergency room. Again, he was fine.
A year later, after repeated persuasion by the doctor, my father agreed to go to the same hospital for a more comprehensive examination. This time I was furious. I scolded him for not learning a lesson, not looking at things from a cultivator’s point of view, and not having righteous thoughts. My father silently listened.
The day I drove him to the hospital, when my father got in the car, I pretended to be engrossed in listening to a work meeting and I ignored him. We didn’t speak to each other all the way there. A week later my father suddenly had severe pain in his lower abdomen. He could not eat. I was exhausted physically and mentally between the emergency room, my mother, work, and family. I looked at these hardships with an ordinary person’s attitude.
When the other practitioners learned about my situation they tried to help by sending righteous thoughts, but they felt something was blocking them.
When they shared their thoughts with me, it awakened me. It turned out that it all happened to point out gaps in my cultivation: My deep resentment caused this.
I resented my father for not being diligent and for viewing his physical ailments with a human mindset. My father’s doctor was adamant, so each time he insisted on something, my father couldn’t remember that he was a practitioner, and agreed to whatever the doctor wanted.
After I communicated with my father, he always asked me to explain to the doctor, and cancel whatever procedure he’d agreed to. He left the problems for me to deal with. Every time I took my father to Stanford Hospital, the round trip took six or seven hours. I reprimanded him and asked why he couldn’t think of himself as a practitioner and have righteous thoughts whenever he felt discomfort. I only thought about the difficulties I endured. To put it bluntly, I wanted to use Dafa as my father’s umbrella to relieve my pressure.
The day before my father’s surgery, I finally found the courage to hold his hand and beg him to forgive me for being selfish. We both wept. I begged Master to give me another chance so that I and my father could cultivate together diligently. I kissed my father’s forehead and told him to recite the two phases silently (“Falun Dafa is good, Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good”). I reminded him to overcome this tribulation so he could continue saving the people he needs to save.
When I got home, I sent forth righteous thoughts for a long time to eliminate all unrighteous factors in my dimension. That night, the doctor and told me that my father’s surgery had gone well. Even though he had not eaten or drunk anything for three weeks, my father miraculously survived.
Conclusion
Once, I looked at cultivation and everyday life separately and switched between the two mechanically. Now, I sincerely feel that in every minute and every second of my life, I am on the path of cultivation and have the opportunity to improve my xinxing and temper my will. What an honor!
Every day when I close the book after memorizing and writing the Fa by dictation, I can’t help but think: What kind of test will be waiting for me when I write the next paragraph by dictation tomorrow? No matter what, I will be firm!
The above is my sharing today. If anything is inappropriate, I would like to ask fellow practitioners to correct me mercifully.
Thank you, Master! Thank you, all!
(Presented at the 2023 San Francisco Falun Dafa Cultivation Experience Sharing Conference)
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